Icke chump: Robbie Williams has a new pal

Robbie Williams has never made a secret of his loneliness, which is caused, in part, by his inability to trust people ’cause he’s so famous. That’s why he only ever hangs out with his dad and that bloke who presented You’ve Been Framed in between Lisa Riley and Harry Hill.

So, we’re heartened to read that Robbie has a new friend he can confide in, someone to lean on and have a kick-about with. Although admittedly, we’re not sure his choice of chum is going to enhance his profile much.

The Sun – yes, it’s them again – says “Yikes… Robbie pal of Icke’s!”, by which they mean David Icke, the former BBC sports presenter famous for doing this on national telly and hence becoming a bit of a laughing stock.

Icke believes, among other things, that creatures called reptilians rule the world, taking on a different physical form so as to fool the world that they are actually human. Or something.

“He has written 20 books on his wild claims, goes on international lecture tours and gets millions of hits on his website,” says the Sun. And you can add to his hits by clicking here. A cynic might say that this is a smart move on Rob’s part, befriending someone who, if they start selling stories about you to a national paper, can be dismissed as a fantasist quite easily. The Sun, however, claims it’s a mutual interest in UFOs that brings the pair together.

Britney Spears has managed to miss yet another court session to decide her future as a mother to her sons Jayden James and Sean Preston, despite actually making it to the court in question at some point that same day.

If ever the time was ripe for the singer to prove she is a trustworthy, mature human being, you might have thought now was the moment. Instead, in a repeat performance of last week’s court carpark events, Spears arrived at Los Angeles Superior Court but left the building before the hearing had begun. It’s not clear exactly why – the Sun simply reports that “the singer, 26, arrived at 9am in a satin cocktail dress and gold shoes, but was seen leaving less than 45 minutes later”.

For a wardrobe change? Perhaps, but not, it would seem, to hang out with Adnan Ghalib. Britney confirmed the story that she has ended her blink-and-you’ll-miss it relationship with the paparazzo. “I am not with him,” being the telling phrase.

If all of this is too much for you to take, imagine how Ghalib’s wife feels. Yes, he has a wife, who the Sun reports has, unsurprisingly, filed for legal separation. Let’s hope she did it by SMS, with some four-letter expletives, because those are some text messages we’d like to read.

Madonna’s shins are under scrutiny in today’s tabloids. Ever the gentleman, Bizarre’s Gordon Smart compares them to those of Elton John, Matt Lucas and Paul Gascoigne, on account of them appearing to have the odd bulbous vein or two. Meanwhile, the Daily Mail pun that “Madge’s beauty is only shin deep…” and decide that the singer has the “shins of a much older woman”. While In The News thinks the 49-year-old’s shins look perfectly grand to us, we are keen to know how many geriatric women’s shins the Mail’s hack has been examining to compare with the pop star’s lower leg region. We hope they were enough to provide a convincing sample.

Kim Dawson’s Playlist has been stirring up trouble over at Daily Star HQ. Following yesterday’s news that indie elders British Sea Power dislike younger pop band Scouting for Girls for writing tunes just to get in the charts, the girl scouters have unleashed a violent rebuttal. To wit: “Rubbish.”

They do go on to flesh out their feelings, though. “Saying that, Greg our bassist loves British Sea Power,” said frontman Roy Stride. “He once queued for 10 hours to get a ticket to see them.” Oh dear, they’re not quite getting the hang of this feuding malarkey, are they? (source: scenta.co.uk)

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